a short essay on productivity

    Becoming a mother has epitomized the word “productive” for the last five years of my life.  Ask any parent and they will likely tell you that having a child is, by far, their hardest yet most rewarding accomplishment.  On the surface it seems so idyllic, one more part of the American Dream, but really, it’s a messy job at best.  During the course of a typical day I spend much time trying to get something, anything done--trying to feel productive--but what it comes down to is simply trying to keep up with the two adorable, counterproductive, tornadoes I call my boys.
    One could say that this recent phase of productivity has my world turned upside down, however, I’m a “glass half full” kind of person, so I will say it finally turned things right-side up.  It redefined so many aspects of life, from loving and giving, to being and doing.  I gave up opportunities to be productive in other ways and in their place found a love that is so easy to give and receive, yet that makes me want to work harder than ever to cultivate it.  I gained new perspective on being: being mindful, patient, forgiving, and being in the moment, which they have taught me is invaluable.  And last but not least, it redefined “doing” which is a list a million miles long; a daunting task, even to the most super-human, vacuum-toting, apron-heels-and-lipstick wearing, Stepford Wife. I have added to that interminable to-do list a part-time job (sometimes two), volunteer work, and, now, a college degree with aspirations of a career.
   So, sometimes being productive is a real, tangible thing, noted (unglamorously, I might add) by clothing washed, bills paid, groceries procured, and meals prepared.  Mostly, though, I have found it to be abstractly measured in toys mended, owies kissed, noses wiped, morning hugs and kisses good night.  I still have goals and dreams, most notably my education and career.  I still aspire to better the status quo, at least for my little corner of the world.  And, I will keep checking things off of my to-do list.  But for me,  for now, my most productive days are those that I survive until bedtime, where I tuck in those precious little bodies tired from doing what they do best-- giving me a reason to be productive.